Today’s guest blog is from Orla Kelly a mum to 2 quirky kids. Orla worked as an 
environmental consultant for over 12 years but her life changed when her son caught TB at 23 months and became really ill. She became a stay at home mum and discovered a love of writing and set up her own blog. She now supports and works with parents whose children have special needs http://www.parenting4specialneeds.com/. Here Orla blogs about how she just needs 30 minute’s peace to get some work done. Not as easy as it sounds!….
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Give me a break guys-it’s only 30 minutes!
I am sitting here in my little office trying to finish something that should really take no 
more than 30 minutes. I think I have everything planned out and my 30 minutes to myself will go smoothly. I go through my mental checklist again.
- It is only 30 minutes, they will survive without me and won’t even know I am “missing”
- Dad knows his kids and everything is under control!
- Dad knows he has to mind kids for 30 minutes only-what can go wrong?
- Kids know Dad is in charge for 30 minutes-Note to self, expect kids to come looking for me at 31 minutes if I haven’t returned downstairs!
- Kids are fed, watered and have entertainment!
Still, I cannot help feeling uneasy and I was right.
After taking myself to the home office with a cup of tea, I am alerted by the sound of my 5 year old on the stairs calling my name. Where is Dad I ask myself? I do not answer but she tracks me down and was not very impressed that I didn’t come running out. She wants nothing but to inform me she wants a drink.
I tell her to ask Dad and she disappears downstairs. I settle back to work only to find my 8 year old son coming into the office to say he is bored and what could he do. I rattle off a list of possibilities but he seems disinterested so I suggest he asks Dad to play with him. He then leaves.
I feel a little uneasy at this stage as I have only “gone” for 10 minutes so far and am already falling behind and have had 2 “visits” already!
No sooner had I put my fingers on the keyboard that I hear two sets of footprints on the stairs of both of my kids wondering why I am taking so long!
I tell them to call me in 20 minutes and show them what the time needs to show on the clock. I even give them a timer hoping it will distract them for the remainder of the time. No chance, they just start fighting over who gets to hold it and are back to me in 5 minutes.
After this time, I go downstairs to see what Dad is up to, and find him chilled out in front of the TV. He had been wondering how the kids were so quiet that they hadn’t gone near him! Hmmm.
At this stage the kids thought work time was over as I was back downstairs and with the look of delight on their faces, I didn’t have the heart to go back upstairs!
“Weren’t we really good Mom while you were working and ever so quiet?” When I looked into their little faces, I couldn’t help but knowledge that yes you are good kids and I love you dearly. (Note to self-last plan failed miserably, need to try harder to come up with a child-proof plan!)
All in a days work!
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My name is Orla. I am a mentor to parents who have children with special needs. I teach them tools and processes that help them with the physical, emotional and psychological challenges they face. Together we learn how it is possible to achieve a harmonious balance in their lives.
For more resources go to http://www.parenting4specialneeds.com
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How well do your children cope without you if you need some time to get a job done? When they know you are busy do they ramp up their demands and suddenly need you more?
You make sure your third child is engaged in an activity before you try to work – they all need something engrossing so half hour can sneak on to 40 minutes – board games appeal to competitive dads.
what if you’re a single parent?
I’m not a single parent but my partner works very long night shifts so I’m alone most of the time. I get most things done right after the kids go to bed – but I make sure to stop at least an hour before bed so I get time to wind down.
I loved this, Orla! As a Mum to a 5 year old girl and a 7 year old boy this could have been written by me! I constantly try to remind myself how lucky I am to have 2 such great kids (over a glass of wine when they’re in bed is usually best time to think this!) but sometimes find myself shrieking “Can I just get some peace for even 5mins?!” At least I’m not alone!
Kick hubby up bum
Funnily enough, this happens in my house. I’ve largely given up on day time work, partly because he works nights anyway and partly because if I try on his days off all hell breaks loose! I’m sure he’d say the same about me though
I totally relate to this all I ask sometimes is to go upstairs to spend time to get ready in peace, or to do something, iron, put clothes away, clean…… it never happens, My toddler comes looking for me or when the going gets tough dad comes up with toddler and new baby, then my 9 year old will wonder why everyone is upstairs and come up also……then I’m left trying to get ready and racing around after the toddler while dad sits on the bed holding baby and getting ready or the work done goes from taking minutes or under an hour..before I know it I’ve been up there 2 hours and then I have to take all the kids downstairs and I’m left to get on with it so dad can have some time to do stuff….I KNOW!!!! ;(
This has been the story of my day so far, every time I leave the room to do something I come back to chaos. So far today my 2 and 3 year olds have drawn all over their faces with felt tip and crushed a whole packet of cream crackers on the kitchen floor.
When I have days like this I just remember that I have chosen to work from home to be with my kids, so just give up until they are in bed